


The Secret Diary Entries of Franklyn Froideveaux

by extremelyperturbed



Category: Hannibal (TV)
Genre: Comedy, Franklyn abuse, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-27
Updated: 2013-08-27
Packaged: 2017-12-24 19:39:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 951
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/943881
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/extremelyperturbed/pseuds/extremelyperturbed
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Just a few entries from Franklyn's diary.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Secret Diary Entries of Franklyn Froideveaux

1\. 

Dear Diary,

Now that I have won the lottery, I can finally have everything I have ever wanted. Higher grades of cheese, oodles of friends and a whole new wardrobe! But first, I must prepare myself for this instant wealth with some therapy. 

2.

Dear Diary,

I have been referred to Dr. Hannibal Lecter by my previous psychiatrist Dr. Jonathan Crane. Dr. Crane acts as if I creep him out somehow. I really don’t know how I could possibly be creeping him out. 

The first appointment was electric. Dr. Lecter is a man of intense charisma. I feel strangely drawn towards him as if I’m a passing asteroid being pulled towards a voracious black hole. He has a fascinating, hard-to-place accent and broad shoulders that hint of strong muscles underneath his suit. Like Dr. Crane, he has the most amazing cheekbones.

Yes, I will continue to see him.

3\. 

Dear Diary,

It’s very frustrating that he has been dissuading me from seeing him outside of his office. It really is most frustrating. I want to touch his greatness. OK, I just want to touch him. 

I confess that there are many things I dare not tell Dr. Lecter . . . After all, I doubt he’d enjoy being told about the dream I had last night where I was a pirate ship captain who invaded sad little villages along the seashore. I spotted him, a handsome warrior wearing only a loin cloth, wielding a fishing trident and a net. He had long hair and a beard, radiating a vital masculinity that you don’t really see in Hollywood anymore. They all look like frat boys gone old nowadays. 

Unfortunately, the dream did not end with me ripping what little clothes he had off and making him swoon within my arms but instead my own crew rebelled against me after he disarmed me with his net, threw me off the boat and chose him as captain. 

How cruel that even my own dreams refuse to side with me! Damn my subconscious!

4.

Dear Diary,

I have made a friend named Tobias Budge. An unusual name, is it not? He is cool, mysterious and while I’m not as drawn to him as I am to my dear doctor, I find him hard to resist. Even if he does occasionally express the desire to kill people.

He has excellent taste in music and because I am trying to blend in with high society, I take his advice in that regard. He’s actually helping me make some headway. He pointed out that writing a check for a hundred thousand dollars to certain charities equaled an invite to certain parties. 

5.

Dear Diary, 

I had another dream about Dr. Lecter. It was in black-and-white. I was a noir detective when Tobias came into my office and asked me to find Dr. Lecter. I asked him why he wanted to see him. He said, “Once you see him, you won’t need an explanation why.”

After much searching, I lock picked my way into the apartment where Dr. Lecter was staying when he walked in, smoldering in an impeccable lacey black dress and high heels. I must confess that it was a pleasant surprise to find that he had such amazing gams and that he had no problems balancing in stilettos, showing a feline grace as he came towards me. “Dr. Lecter,” I said.

“Tobias sent you, didn’t he?”

“How did you know?”

It was then I felt myself flung back by the impact of the bullet from a pearl-handled revolver. I woke up right after I saw him blow the smoke from the end of his gun. I could only wonder to myself if that was phallic imagery. 

Why is it that every single dream I have of him has him kick my ass? Why?

6\. 

Dear Diary,

Like Batman’s arch nemesis is the Joker, Will Graham is my arch nemesis! I was merely driving by (never stalking because stalking is wrong) Hannibal’s house when I saw a scruffy, hideous hobo came out of his front door. I was about to call 911 out of fear he had done something violently horrible when Dr. Lecter came out the front door and called his name. The man turned around and smiled as Dr. Lecter handed him several containers of food. I was truly beginning to swoon at my beloved acting charitable when he put his hands on the man’s shoulders and kissed him goodbye. That is taking charity too far!

I had to call a private investigator to find out the man’s name and I must say that what I know about him makes him sound like a dangerous character! How do I warn my doctor when I am not supposed to know who he is? It’s the type of thing that makes me bite my pillow in frustration at night.

7\. 

Dear Diary,

I had a dream that fills me full of dread. Dr. Lecter was a prince kidnapped by a giant wolf creature. I gallantly went forth to rescue him, only to have the most foul luck when it came to the journey to the beast’s castle. I was wearing a suit of armor when lightning struck me. Birds constantly chose to plop their droppings on me and my horse ran away and my sword became blunt and rusty.

I finally reached the castle, ready to slay the creature when I saw it licking Dr. Lecter’s hand and Dr. Lecter murmuring, “Good boy, oh good boy.” He saw me and frowned.

“I am here to save you.”

He pointed at me and said, “Attack! Attack!” 

I woke up and thought, Brain, why do you torment me so?

 

The End

**Author's Note:**

> I'm going to be sad if the second season rolls around and nobody writes fic about him any more. Also, Franklyn doesn't seem too comfortable with his money & class on the show so I pretend he's a lottery winner who finally thinks money is going to be able to make him something he's not.


End file.
